Remember that recipe post I promised you? It’s still on it’s way. Completing it will just take more time than I’ve wanted to put in this week. In the meantime…
I thought I would share my two cents about coping with transition. I am well aware (painfully so) that I do not have all the answers in this area. However I feel like completing my first trans-Atlantic flight in-utero and completely changing cultures twice before I even started grade school gives me a decent background to address the topic.
That background does not qualify me to deal with transition well. It does mean I have learned how to cope with transition, but if those are bad coping habits they are not very useful. I am eternally grateful to some people I have encountered in the last few years who helped me process my transitioning habits. Some of those habits are helpful and good while others are downright destructive.
My most destructive habit was relational/emotional. When I had to shift from one place to another I would cut off all communication and emotional attachment to the one I was leaving as much as possible. This is a very bad thing to do. I would basically take a deep breath and then prepare to remake myself into whatever would fit best into my new environment.
This time around, I am trying to be more mindful about what elements I keep from my old home and what elements I leave behind. I want to have grace for myself and realize that I will not always do everything perfectly, and that is okay. This is a marvelous opportunity to reflect on who I am independently of my surroundings.
I have made some resolutions: I go to bed on time, at the same time, almost every night after following the same bedtime routine. This sounds tiny, but being well-rested and knowing when my day will end helps me remember some rhythms will continue no matter where I go. In the morning, I make myself get out of bed, even if I do not have anywhere to be or any big reason to get going. I am running a lot and making conscious choices about my nutrition.
Then I have a spoonful of cookie dough… or three. I take a day off and keep my contact channels closed. I set my alarm later than I need to. I watch Jimmy Fallon’s monologue when I should be winding down in bed. These things are okay. My life is currently leaping out of my control: sometimes I respond to this by creating control in my routine, and sometimes I respond to it by creating space outside of my routine. I need both to keep going.
Through this whole journey I want to be mindful of my actions and my reactions. I do not have to over-think them, but I want my life to be beautiful like a well-composed piece of music. I need to set the notes to keep it going, but the pauses between them is what makes them work together. Ultimately I am surrendering control of the melody.
There are moments that do not sound great, but they are working together for my good. They sound even better with a little cookie dough.